all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
