currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
