Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
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