I need to just get drunk and eat a pot pie.
I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Randomize
