you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
Randomize
