he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Hyyypothetically, what would you do if you happened to see my boobs on the internet?
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
