dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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