He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
I wish your couch was made out of beer. I would drink like half of it.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
High. As. Fuck. I thought the kid next to me didn't have an arm for like 2 hours.
Hahahaha I'm glad you woke me up with this text.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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