The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Randomize
