apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
Randomize