Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize