Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
You're breaking my sexual little heart
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