DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize
