If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
You left half a beer on someones car and claimed it was a second day of hanakuh gift
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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