that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I will be naked everywhere
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
Randomize
