Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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