How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Moan for me like Helen Keller
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
