Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Randomize
