This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Randomize
