Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
