I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
It feels like I shit a light bulb that shattered on the way out.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
