Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
Lesson learned: don't hide your vodka in your little brothers toy box.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
Randomize
