What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
By the way, turns out "Danny B" is his penis. Not his cousin. I was right.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
