You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
You were trust falling into bushes
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
