He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
Randomize
