You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
worst night to have a conscience
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
Randomize
