He is an equal opportunity slut.
home. puking in laundry basket.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Randomize
