We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
