How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
Randomize
