I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
