The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
Randomize