what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Actions speak louder than pants.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
