I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
