so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize