The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
