Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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