Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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