im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
Randomize
