White coat. Heels.
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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