Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
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