do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Theres someone in the car behind me eating corn on the cob & talking on the phone
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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