WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
