I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
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