google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
