Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
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