before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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