the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Randomize
