By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
