worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Randomize
