I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
I sexy timed too hard and there is an ass shaped piece of a ping pong table now missing bc of it. How am I allowed to leave the house without a helmet?
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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